Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Holiday family sharing

I love the holidays, they used to be my favorite time of the year. Then I got married and found the stress that comes with them. It is so hard to spread out to see all the families, especially when one side is split and you must fit in two different parent events just for that side of the family!

You would think after 25 years of marriage it would be easier, but nope, in some ways it just keeps getting harder. Life gets busier, kids get older and start families of their own, jobs get more demanding. Finding a balance that makes everyone happy just seems to be impossible.

This holiday I have decided it is about making me happy, making sure I have the time with my children. Reminding myself that soon enough I will have to share them with other families, and trying to take the less stressful route of being in the moment with them now. I do feel bad that both of our extended families have less time with us, but I must grab this moment and enjoy it for as long as I can!

I am beyond thankful for the mom I have. My mom has made our holidays seem magical, so many small traditions she did with us as kids that we have carried over to our children. Teaching us the importance of family and Christmas. She tries to put very little pressure on us for the holidays, she might not be happy but is understanding when we can't make it on the holiday or if we don't make it to her house till late in the morning/afternoon on Christmas day. She is the first to remind us that we must share with others. She is always accommodating to all of us that have other family events we must attend. She understands that we also have family traditions that we need to honor, that we need to spend time with each other before the craziness of the family gathering is upon us. Sadly as a parent I recognize that it is no longer just about us when our children start families, it has to be about their family and traditions also. I am taking the example my mom has shown and will be happy with the time my children are willing to give to me. I hope that I will be as willing to work out the schedule to fit their families as my mom has been. Reminding myself that the holiday does not have to be celebrated on the actual day to feel the spirit of being together.

I am blessed that my oldest has chosen a girl that we adore. She is loving and accepting of all the crazy that goes on in our family. She always makes time to share with us and her family. I pray that my next two will choose as wisely in their significant others as my oldest has.

So off we go to make the rounds, try to make everyone happy, which is completely impossible. So this year it is about making my immediate family happy, enjoying my children and spending time with our extended families in the best way we can.

Hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving and a Magical Christmas and New Year!