Girls like boys

It is official, my baby girl is no longer a baby girl. Wahhhhhhhh! I could cry and laugh all at the same time. She has discovered that she likes boys, AND that boys like her. She will be 12 years old in just about a month.

Wow, 12 years ago seems like yesterday. I can still hear my Uncle Don as he came through the hospital door singing "They call the wind Mariah" in his beautiful voice. I tell this story all the time, but it was also bring your daughter to work day. The delivery nurse brought her 12 year old daughter to work to view Mariah's birth that day. What do you say when your legs are in stirrups and that pushing feeling is coming over you and the nurse nonchalantly says "You don't mind if my daughter watches you give birth do you?" Why yes I just might if I could concentrate on what you are saying while all my private parts hang out here for the viewing!!!!!

So a few of Mariah's friends have had a BOYFRIEND for whatever that word means at age 12. A boy that likes a girl I guess. I thought my tomboy would be the one who didn't like boys for a long time. She is the girl that wears all her brothers hand me downs like they are the best name brand clothing you can find. Teachers and her coaches have actually asked me if she ever removes the sweatshirt in the picture above. The only time you will catch this girl in a dress is for a very special occasion, Christmas, Easter, Father daughter dance. Other than that she is in clothing that she can run and jump faster and better than any boy, you just ask her.

Last week a boy she wasn't sure if she liked said the words to her. Mariah I like you! She was really surprised, she thought he might like her but she didn't know for sure. My little thinker didn't know what to say. She was speechless for that moment and then got all shy. She came home to tell me about it and that she thought she liked him to. I talked to her about how you should be nice to everyone even if you don't like the boy in the same way. You never know how you will feel about him later in life, and you never want anyone to feel badly about their feelings they have. It is a big compliment that a boy likes you and even bigger when a lot of the boys in your class like you. We had the discussion that she is 12 and cannot have a boyfriend. I have told her many times the same thing. He is a boy and your friend that you like a little more than the other boys. But that is it! No BOYFRIENDS for her for a long time. She sat and thought about it for a week on what she was going to say to this poor little boy who had poured his heart out to her.

Finally last night she got up the nerve at the skating party and told him she likes him too. It was so cute. She came right over to tell me that she had finally done it. All her friends at the party knew and the news spread like wild fire. I saw the boys mom whom I am on a friendly basis with and wondered if she knew the news flying around. I didn't say anything because of course this will pass on by as quickly as it has started. I remember this age and the quickness the likeness wears off.

Sad to see the last of the younger years leaving and the pre-teen years beginning. Lord give me strength to make it through this one. I think I am going to need it. I am afraid I might actually have to hide her away, the boys are chasing her already and we haven't made it to puberty yet. The idea of a convent is not such a bad thing some days. Or that all girls school.....

Best Dog Ever

This love story started back in the year 2ooo. We decided to get a new puppy to replace our dog that had been put down. Foolishly we thought that two black lab puppies would be better than one. Let me tell you all, DON'T DO IT!! It ended badly for one of the puppies and was a very sad time.

The other puppy Storm grew to a great old age. He was the best dog I could ever ask for. He was a babysitter, friend, helper and true love of my kids lives. Mariah was one years old when we brought him home, Colton was 4 and Anthony 11. Storm was Anthony's dog in every way, but he shared him with all of us. They grew together and loved. He was the best friend two little boys, a little girl, and all their cousins and friends could ask for. There was never a ball, stick or body of water that he would not chase or jump into. Hours upon hours of chasing a ball, sitting next to the swimming pool waiting for his kids to splash him or throw the ball he dropped in for him. Always by their side when they were home, or sitting close to the window waiting for them to come back to him.

Storm considered it his job to make sure his kids were safe, and no stranger was ever allowed with in feet of them. This was Storm's personal mission. Storm would put his body between anyone he did not know and his kids. He was a great protector, I knew my kids were always safe outside when their dog was with them. He would herd the little ones if he felt they were to close to the edge of the grass, bark if the kids left the yard and he didn't want them to.

Hard to remember the trials of the puppy days, but there were all the usual, chewed up drywall, chewed up furniture. The nights being up all night. The chasing down of a rogue puppy running the neighborhood. The dog police showing up at our house, giving us our third and final notice, if our dog escaped again someone was going to spend some time in the pokey. They let us know there are no bad dogs, just bad dog owners which I guess is very true. We have laughed about that for many years now. Food snatched from the table or counter. Now these seem such a small price to pay for the unconditional love that was given for 11 years.

We have known that the time was coming close. I have tried to prepare my children for the sad part of life.....death. It is not easy and so hard to understand. How to explain it is best that we put our dog to sleep so he does not suffer anymore. We don't do that to humans so how can I expect my daughter to understand it is okay to do to her best friend? How do I answer the questions she has. She is worried that our other dog and cat are not going to understand where Storm has gone. Worried she will forget how Storm's fur feels, the sound of his bark when she gets home. That he will no longer be lying next to her bed during the night making her feel safe.

This has been a hard week at our house. Reality has come, and today our best friend is going to sleep forever. My kids hearts are breaking and I cannot stop the pain. My daughter has cried herself to sleep every night. My oldest is brooding and quiet, spending as much time here with his friend as he can. My middle child is silent and unhappy. We have had a parade of cousins and friends that grew up with Storm coming by to spend a few minutes with him. He is loved by so many and will be missed by all. He has been my constant companion, there when the kids have left me for school, keeping me company and always making me feel safe.

Goodbye to THE BEST DOG EVER. I can't stop crying. My life once again is changing, a constant in my life is leaving us and I am going to be sad for so long. I hate that I cannot fix the pain my children are feeling, but recognize this is an important part of life. Death sucks, but we all know that we have to face it and deal with it.

Thank you Storm for your unconditional love and beauty that you have given us for 11 of the best years. We will love you and think of you often.

HAPPY / SAD

I don't really like change. I know, hard to believe! Today I am learning that change is okay. Everything has a time and the time has come now for my son to leave club soccer. It is hard to let go of that in some ways, but such a major relief in other ways.

I asked Colton if he was sad and will he miss his friends from soccer. He said not that sad and he will keep in contact through facebook with a lot of the boys. Then he said how much he will miss the weekly practice and his coach. Luckily he is starting his wrestling season and then the potential for so many other things. He will have open weekends, the first in a very long time.

I will miss seeing him practice and play competitive soccer. He is a good player, such potential that the coaches never tapped into. I will miss the friends I have made along this journey with him. The bond of our children being on the same team for multiple years. It is like letting go of a piece of me I didn't know defined me so much. I will still be a soccer mom, but now I will be a football/wrestling mom too. This is a good reminder that I am more than just the mom, I am me with so many outside interest that I have put on the back burner for this sport.

I will not miss the politics on his team, the drain on our income, or the doubts about Colton's abilities. This is really a racket someone has come up with, I tell ya. Money poured into a sport so your child can make the high school team, and then they tell you don't play high school soccer, only club if you want to be a real soccer snob. The money in this sport is crazy and crazier that we as parents fall into the trap. In the world of competitive soccer if you are not on the "A" team, then your abilities are never fully recognized, they just take your money and tell you to keep striving for the top team. I will not miss that one small bit, but will still have it while Mariah plays club soccer.

The good news is that he is very good at lots of sports and will go on to participate in them for high school. I will still be Colton's mom just not always on the soccer field. Now I will have one winter season of sitting in a gym instead of always on the soccer field.

I find it such different worlds for boys and girls and their team commitments. Boys can commit to a team and play with anybody if they are of the same ability as themselves. Girls, on the other hand, really need to bond on an emotional level with their teammates to really feel comfortable and compete together. I find it fascinating the way it works. Colton has loved his team, liked the players but never found it necessary to hang out with them after the game/practice time. The boys that attend the same school do hang out together, but the rest are just friends at practice. Mariah on the other hand, loves her team, is friends with all the girls and chooses to hang out with them outside of soccer.

Here is to a new season in life for Colton. May he find this path to be the best of choices. I know he will be happy and do well. He is looking forward to high school next year and all it has to offer. I am looking forward to one less sporting event every weekend. School sports are the best because they don't usually take up all your weekends of the year.

So that is the answer, happy to be on to a new chapter, sad to see this chapter close. It means it is one step closer to my children growing up, I am not always that prepared for this to happen.

Happy New Year

Wow, so hard to believe a whole year has passed with out my writing anything here. Life is so busy, the older the kids get the less time I have.

This year has been a whirlwind of events it seems. Both of my younger two children played soccer year round and then decided to throw in a few other sports.

Colton discovered he has a love for wrestling and is very good at it. He went to districts his first year of wrestling. He also found out he is very good as a football kicker. He played for the 8th grade team and they already told him he is better than the high school kicker and has a good chance of making varsity as a freshman next year. He is doing well with his grades, 8th grade seems to be a hard year for school work, but he is persevering and keeping a good grade average. I am excited for him to enter high school next year, I think he will really like it.

Mariah discovered there are other sports out there she does like, well I guess just one, volleyball. My awesome sister Kim and our friend Leticia coached the girls volleyball team. It was a great season, Mariah loved it. During one of our games she mixed up her sports and headed the ball over the net, which I guess is totally legal! It was so awesome, she scored on that header. I am almost as happy as her Aunt Kim that she has found a love for volleyball. She is turning into such an amazing artist, I can't wait to see where life takes her.

Our oldest son Anthony and his girlfriend Melaina turned 21 this year! Wow seems so weird to say that out loud. I can't believe my first born love is 21. He is such a fantastic kid I can't even say enough, I hope I did as good a job with his younger siblings and they turn out to be just like him. We took a trip to Las Vegas to celebrate his birthday. We had a group of just under 30. We stayed out to all ours of the night and hung out by the pool to recover during the days. It was such a great trip. Fun to go with all my family and friends.

This summer was beautiful here, we spent a lot of time out by the pool. When we were not traveling to different soccer tournaments across the state. We made it to every corner of our state this summer/fall for either soccer or camping. Thanks to my parents who did a lot of the soccer trips with me. It is fun but exhausting being gone every weekend. Next year should be a little better, Colton is giving up club soccer to play high school sports. Not only a relief in our budget but in our time away from home. It will be a huge adjustment for him to give up daily soccer, but I think he will enjoy it after he settles in. The other sports should keep him busy but still allow him to have a social life in high school.

Our yearly camping trip was fantastic as usual. The weather was hot and the lake was beautiful. The kids have the best time with all their cousins and friends. I love my family, they are the best! Even if we do spend to much time together sometimes. I love that we can fight it out with a knock down drag out match and then be hugging each other when it is all over.

I am thankful for my awesome husband, fantastic children and the best family and friends a person can ask for. I am looking forward to the new year. I can't wait to see the adventures and trials and tribulations it will bring to us all. Goodbye 2010.............HELLO 2011!!!!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE, STAY SAFE AND JOYFUL!!!

Thankful

I am reminded this month to recognize those things we are most thankful for.

I am forever thankful for my children, and everyday that I have to tell them how much I love them. Everyday that I get to hug them, speak with them, spend every moment of time I can with them. I am thankful for all those hours I spend at their practices being able to watch them move, and be, to see them live their lives.

This has been a rough week in our community. My oldest son had some friends that were killed in a car accident, two died and two were seriously hurt. It has been a huge reminder to me of what is truly important in life, the people you love. It is amazing how many lives are affected by this, it is like a spider web that spreads through out the community. It has touched so many different people.

Losing a child is tragic, heartbreaking. The hardest funerals I have ever attended involved those under 20 years old. It just is not natural. And so wrenching to the heart of every parent. My heart is crying for those parents that lost their sons. They were good boys, and the light of their parents lives. I can only imagine what I would feel if my son had been in that car. It is a horrible feeling to feel relief that your child is okay, when someone else has lost their precious child. I long for their children to be okay also.

It is painful to understand, let alone explain these deaths to my younger children. Hard to let your kids walk out the door out of your sight. I feel like I have to call Anthony everyday just to hear his voice and know that he is Okay. I am sad that his life will be forever changed by these events. This is the first death of a friend that he has experienced. It is always that first tragic event that changes your whole being. He will never be that young carefree kid that doesn't know this pain. It makes me cry for his group of friends that will feel this loss for so long.

It was a huge wake up call for me. I question the things I find myself focusing on. Does it really matter if Coltons soccer team sucks this year. Will it change things if they don't do the dishes the way I would like them done. Does it really matter that they forgot for TWO weeks to put out the garbage can (BUT MAN WAS I MAD BEFORE THIS!). Or when they ate the last jar of canned peaches that I really, really wanted. I realized that these are such minor things and really will be lost in the big picture of this thing we call life.

So here I sit praying that these families have the strength to make it through their tragedy. Hope that they will have the support they need. Hope that they find a way to make it through all of this with their sanity intact, because that is what I feel I would lose if it was me. And forever and ever thankful for every single minute (even the arguments where I want to duct tape their mouths shut) that I have with my children.

My moto this month is: Hug your children and tell them you love them every single day, you don't know how long you have them for.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone, I know mine will be spent reflecting on the important things in my life. I hope yours is a happy one also!

SOCCER, SOCCER, SOCCER

Mariah said she feels like she lives at the soccer field in this picture.

Colton wishes he lived on a soccer field!

So this soccer season has been a real challenge for me. First off, I have discovered that I am more competitive than I would like my siblings to know.... SHHHH! Both my younger kids are in a select soccer program. Colton has been obsessed with soccer since he was a baby. All those years of being on the sideline for his brothers soccer games gave him a true love of the game. There is rarely a time that boy does not have a ball at his feet. He would dribble the ball up and down the sideline while his brother was on the field. He kicks it through my house (even though the rule is no balls in the house!!) annoying his sister at every turn/kick. Mariah loves soccer, sometimes I think only because her brothers do, but still it is the only sport she wants to play.

In my house the kids are required to be involved in some sport or physical activity. Each of them has chosen soccer as their activity, after trying multiple other sports, and dancing for Mariah. For all of you with kids in sports or any activity you know about the politics involved. The higher the competition the more politics it seems to involve. It is horrible being the parent and trying to navigate through this mess we adults create, there should really be some guide to help us out. Colton is my first child involved in select so it has been a true learning experience these past few years. This is Mariah's first year in the program and she is loving it, especially her coach.

The only club Colton has wanted to play for since starting select is the one he is at. He is on the B team, but striving for the A team. We have had a lot of problems on his team this year. It is like the A team is the all important team and the B team is the forgotten kids. There was a high turn over rate, players not really meshing together and the other usual team problems. As in every club (I am discovering) promises were made at the beginning of the season and not followed through on. Promises that they would move players between teams, and practice both squads together to help the B team prepare to move up. The usual things these clubs promise, others are just better at following through on them.

Those of you who know me, know that I am a bit of an ostrich when it comes to confronting issues. I really don't like to complain, it makes me uneasy. I like to bury my head, and hope upon all hope, it will fix itself. That will last for only so long, and then it is like an explosion, and my head pops off and starts spinning around....I am sure that is what my family sees. Especially if you are messing with my kids. So after listening to all the Dads on the team bitch and moan about the issues, I couldn't take it any more. I did the last thing I really like to do. I confronted the issues with our coach and the Directors of our club.

Thanks to a little motivation from my husband, my Mom and my sister Kim. I forced myself to compose a letter. Kim helped me revise it and I got the courage (that was probably more the anger) up and emailed the letter off. I addressed the issues I saw happening and some specific ones that involved Colton, and the position he plays. I am always hesitant to do this just because I worry that it will be Colton that is punished in the end. I was very skeptical that it would even make a difference. My experience so far had been that they just blow you off and tell you they are the coaches and they make the decisions, even though I am the person paying their salary!

I would like to say I am very happy with the results, thus far. A few other parents spoke up (but not the most vocal complainers!) and voiced their opinions, and backed up what I had to say. Our coach actually answered back and said sorry that he was unapproachable. He told me that Colton is a real trouper and willing to play whatever position he is asked. He acknowledged that Colton has been asking to play a different position, which is huge. I tried to address him last year and got the response listed above. The players Director and the A team coach actually contacted me and the other parents. It actually looks like they will be following through on some of their promises to these boys. That is MY biggest complaint, don't make promises or suggestions and then not follow through with kids. They take this to heart and get so disappointed and less trusting when that happens.

I can't express enough how much happier I am now. For me it is a huge deal that I actually stood up and said my peace. The older I get the better I am getting at doing this. I am a people pleaser and I don't like to make waves. I want everyone to be happy, but I have discovered that if I am not happy than it really doesn't matter if the others are happy or not. I feel like now I can face this losing soccer season and be happy with the progress each of my children are making in their sport.

Ahhhh so much better than being angry every time I leave the soccer field. Especially seems that I am spending 5 out of the 7 days of my week at the fields. Makes everyone in my house a little happier too, just ask my husband!

CAMPING

Well our annual family camping trip went great! Never mind the 5 hours we were stuck at Vantage rest area on the hottest day, it was over 100 degrees. Our old motor home does NOT like that kind of heat, who can blame it, we were not loving it ourselves! We kept getting vapor locking, but that was our only problem on the 6 hour drive that took 12 hours. It was great people watching time at the rest area, we played Yahtzee and watched a movie and all the other people overheating from the heat. There was a little Mexican couple selling watermelons for $5 a piece. The watermelon looked yummy, but way to hot and sticky for that. They sold quite a few while we were there. We got quite a laugh when they pulled out their umbrella. We thought they were finally going to need some shade to sit in, but instead they covered their watermelon to shield them from the sun. The important things in life you know.



A whole week spent with all of my immediate family, cousins and more than a few of our friends. No major arguments. Instead we all passed around the Norovirus (for all that don't know it is the stomach flu, it comes out both ends!). That was awesome.....NOT!!! Even that could not ruin our good times, we made it through. I have never spent so much time discussing our bodily functions as an adult....actually I don't remember discussing it that much as a kid either. It was rather funny, after I started feeling better. It is quite amazing how quickly and randomly it makes its way through a group of people.



It was very strange being at the lake this year without my oldest son. It is the first time in 20 years that he was not with me at Curlew. It was a different vacation all around for me. Both my younger two are old enough to do so much by themselves. Strange not to have a little one to hang on me or to chase after. It was nice but a little sad also.



The kids all had a great time as usual. The four boy cousins had a great time. Lots of fishing, wake boarding, surfing and of course inner-tubing! Mariah lucked out and one of our friends with twin girls her age were there. It was a nice surprise for her, usually she is the lone older girl.



Mariah learned to surf this year, she is amazing. She made wake boarding look so easy, up and out of the water like she has been doing it for years! She is going to keep up with those boys if it kills her. This year she loved inner-tubing, she even wanted to go fast and furious, so different from last year.



Colton was amazing as usual. He is so hard on himself, never thinking he is as good as the older boys. I remind him (and his Aunt Kim does also) that he is almost two years younger than the other boys. He did a butter slide on the wake board, he is very excited about that. He looked awesome when he surfed and had so much fun riding the tube. One of our friends Aaron brought his stand up jet ski for the boys to ride. I was leery about letting Colton ride it, but his Aunt Kim said go ahead. All the other boys were taking turns. Next year Colton and Joe and hopefully Austin and Alex will all have their boating permits so I won't have to worry as much about them riding the ski's or driving the boats.



The water was amazing, so warm. We swam almost every day. Darrel, Dad, Troy and the boys did awesome fishing. Spent lots time playing Yahtzee. Mom and Rob had a little water fight during our late night Yahtzee, it was hilarious and everyone ended up with either water or someones drink on them. Our poor neighbors, we laughed forever.



Thankfully the trip home was uneventful. I hate to say it but it was nice to come home to the cooler weather for a few days, I missed the rain this summer, happy to see some of it. My lawn and plants are especially happy too.



Vacation is awesome but it is amazing how nice it feels to be home. Our kitty Ms Olivia missed us and has been on her best behavior since we came back. Amazing for her.